In today’s age of digital living, sharing personal moments on social media has become second nature for many young adults. From Instagram stories to anonymous confessions, this impulse isn’t just a social habit or behaviour, but it reflects deeper psychological needs around identity, validation, and connection. Behind every post, every filtered photo, or every vulnerable caption is a window into our evolving sense of self.
So, what compels young adults to post their lives online? New research has some compelling answers.
The Need for Social Connection
Early adulthood is a time of transformation —leaving the family home, starting new romantic relationships, and figuring out their identity.Psychosocial theories emphasize that during this stage of development there is a need for young adults to form intimate, committed relationships. Young adults are also exploring where they belong, and social media gives them the ability to maintain friendships, connect with others who may be remote, and, even if they never meet in person, they can feel connected.
Research supports this position. Digital contact, such messages that are sent on the phone, video calls, likes, and comments, create a connection and feeling of “being there” with friends and community. Small signals of awareness – reactions, comments – are often the expected digital support and serve as a type of “virtual hug.”
Validation as Psychological Fuel
The internet is a mirror—reflecting back how others see us. For young adults who are struggling with self-image or self-worth, a simple like or comment, can feel validating and affirming which is particularly vital during a stage of psychosocial development when many young adults are uneasy of their self-worth.
Sometimes when a person’s sense of worth becomes strongly tied to the reactions and validation they get online is referred to as validation-sickness is problematic in a mental health context.
This develops when young social media users rely on other people’s external validation of them for their happiness, my self worth becomes reliant on the number of likes or compliments I receive for my recent post.
Identity Sharing in a Digital World
When you post something online, be it a selfie, a milestone, or a spotify wrap we're sharing some aspect of our identity for the world to see. Young adults use social media as a tool to claim and show off your evolving self. This is influenced by both culture and context.
Some research suggests this process is regulated by aspects of gender roles and cultural customs. For example, a study on young women in South Africa indicates that they were influenced by both visual curation of posts and how socially engaging they were—not only for their own personalities, but also who they were in their community.
In contrast, when something is posted with complete anonymity, many people identified the freedom to be vulnerable and authentic in ways they had not when they were identifiable. Online anonymity from platforms such as Reddit or anonymous instagram accounts provides a space for young adults to safely experience expressing who they are—from mental health issues to transformation journeys—without fear of judgment. Anonymity can be a place for authentic connection, although in some instances it does traverse into the performative space.
FOMO: A Double-Edged Sword.
Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) plays a significant role in young adults’ posting behaviors. Seeing peers’ highlight reels - parties, accomplishments, vacations, etc - can negatively impact young adults' own sense of happiness and emerges comparison.
FOMO drives many young adults to post more frequently and to create their own highlights in order to stay relevant and connected to their community. Viral trends and viral challenges like those on TikTok and instagram influence users to act fast, follow the same trends, and create out of a sense of urgency, rather than creativity.
The result? Social media fatigue - overwhelm, and pressure to stay connected and relevant through an online persona. This challenge can be amplified for online influencers/content creators as their curated online self and real-world responsibilities can become difficult to navigate. Tomar and Dubey indicated the psychological toll on someone who is consistently producing content, and how it can cross the divide between our real self and online self.
Ultimately, Social media is not inherently good or bad; it is how we use social media that determines its influence. When we shift our thinking from comparisons and numbers to authentic connection, we experience social media more as support and less as pressure. We can improve our self-esteem and digital well-being simply by prioritizing authentic relationships over likes, balancing our online interactions and being with people in real life, and getting clearer on why we share in the first place. In times of uncertainty, when young adults are trying to find their way, social media can offer a place of belonging and self-expression, if we can use social media intentionally. By setting healthy boundaries, being mindful, embracing authenticity instead of appearing a certain way, we can use social networks as meaningful places of connection, self-awareness, and emotional wellness.
Kaavya Shah
